oh, how tiresome.oh, how tiresome.

First you pivot your bullshit intelligence company to a "bitcoin hedge fund" (hoard?!) but don't call it that; sounds bad.

Then you start financialize the shit out of it, issuing overpriced fiat liabilities and pretend it was the point and purpose with bitcoin all along. Bitcoin isn't money, the fiat shit I issue is money!

Alas, when it doesn't work and the paper bitcoin summer stopped giving you free financial-market value, and you barely avoided death-spiral collapse by locking in major losses, you dilute your shareholders even more to just sit on stinking fiat paper.

Background: Strategy, our beloved financialized overlords, is in dire straits and so selling coins and printing shares to instead sit on cash.

Today, they announced that they had diluted shareholders 1.3% more... in order to hold more cash. Dilution as a Service, DaaS, is strong with this one #1292636

Fair enough, US Treasury yields are like 4.5%, which is a way better investment than bitcoin.Fair enough, US Treasury yields are like 4.5%, which is a way better investment than bitcoin.

Also: waaaay better than Strategy has achieved in its entire bitcoin history.

BUT, don't call it dilution... bad for the memes, bad for the 80-IQ plebs who learned that bitcoin is wonderful because it doesn't dilute its owners. I KNOW, let's call it "increase USD".

At least they didn't go with "strengthening liquidity" #1521292 or some other such stupid, misleading euphemism. (Looking at you NAKA... and all the third-rate Nordic Strategy copy-cats.)

So, I get it. I just don't get why anyone would wanna own this? You can just hold Treasuries yourself, anon.

Fiat delenda est. Strategy tooFiat delenda est. Strategy too

update: ah, yes, the memes are great