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Mhh, I think I didn't answer your questions in my other reply.
I, the writer, do not know what Duanys said, and I didn’t intend for either myself or the reader to know. “He never saw her heartbroken smile” implies that the narrator knows more than the unnamed protagonist, so it makes sense to wonder whether the reader might have been given these words later, but mhh, I think not.
In this case, I think it’s more important to keep the reader wondering about what exactly happened, just like the protagonist.
Thank you for your questions! They made me think more about how I think about my short stories. I actually didn’t think about it as much while I was writing as I did now!
It was just another example of why he, who has no name, doesn't possess the truth. He can't remember what happened, because high levels of adrenaline impair memory.
So unfortunately, he doesn't even know why he wanted to kill another person. All he remembers is that it was all he could think about, and it haunts him that it happened and that he doesn't even know why.
I wonder why we’re not afforded the knowledge of these words. is it too much for us, and you, the writer, are sparing our sensibilities? or do you yourself not know? or if we were able to spend more time with these characters, would we be able to infer?